On habits and manners

You must not pass between the fire or the light and any one; must not sit in any awkward or familiar position in the presence ot others ; must not smoke without asking permission ; must not chew, or, above all things, spit ; must not cough, sneeze, or blow your nose loudly or obtrusively. You should always carry and carefully use a pocket handkerchief ; and with it cover your mouth when you sneeze, cough, or yawn (turning your head aside at the same time), while the various other uses to which it can be put, make it an indispensable article of your attire. If you can avoid it, you should not sit or stand with your back toward any one, and when in company should never yawn, as this latter is a rude indication that you are tired of the people about you. To whistle or sing audibly is in very bad taste, and you must most certainly not allow yourself to pick your teeth, scratch your head or any part of your person, clean your nails, or take any similar liberty before people. You must not talk in a loud voice, call loudly to attract another person's attention, must not use rough or coarse language, and must never, anywhere or at anytime, be guilty of profanity. In regard to this last fault I would gladly speak to you at length and most earnestly, but I think the sin has been wisely summed up in the words of a famous clergyman who once said that " there could be no excuse for profanity, for it was not only wicked and ungentlemanly, but also consummately foolish," a description so true that it ought to be enough to deter any thoughtful man from the use of so called strong language. In a less degree it also applies to any coarseness or vulgarity of word or gesture, than which nothing is more repugnant to refined persons, and as this is a specially dangerous fault for young men who are apt to take a good deal of license among themselves, you will have to guard against it very carefully, remembering that the expressions which you permit yourself to use habitually when you are with your daily companions, will almost invariably crop out in your general conversation. If you use coarse, rough, language and gestures, when you are with the men and boys who are your ordinary associates, you will find it very difficult to change your custom when you are with other people, for which reason (and for many others), it is best, if you mean to be a gentleman at all, to be a gentleman always. When the door of a room which does not belong to you , or in which you have not at least an equal right with others, is closed, do not try to open it, but knock and await the answer of those within. When you enter a room always remove your hat, and touch, or remove it when you meet an acquaintance; while upon your first entrance into a room you should speak or bow to each person in it, unless, of course, the number is very large, and should do the same upon leaving. When you are introducel to any one you should bow and begin a conversation upon some subject of common interest, shaking hands, in this country, not being usual except among friends. In conversation be careful not to put yourself and your opinions forward, to interrupt any one who may be speaking, to talk much of yourself or your own affairs, or to introduce any merely personal subject.