On habits and manners

Taking for granted that you understand already the necessity of making your dress and person as neat as the nature of your work will permit, before you present yourself at table, I must ask you to remember that haste in seating or helping yourself before others is simply unpardonable, being so gross a violation of good manners, that I trust your own instinct and kind feeling will make it unnecessary for me to do more than allude to it. Premising, therefore, that you have seated yourself quietly (and I would here remark, that, as in well ordered households there is no irregularity in the time of meals, so there should be promptness on the part of individuals), I want you to be careful always to exchange polite and kindly greetings with those who sit at meat with you, whom you may not have previously met during the day. A cheery " Good-morning/' a bright smile, a bow to any one who may not be near enough for a word, serve to make the meet ing pleasant, and to open the way for the conversation which is, or ought to be, an important part of every meal. That is, while loud or careless talk is of course inadmissible it is a wise and pleasant thing to converse, in low tones, eas ily, upon topics of general interest (never in whispers or upon purely personal matters); for this prevents you from falling into the graceless and unwholesome habit of fast eating, and when you have been working hard is often a mental rest and relief. And now your repast is before you, and the first question which presents itself is one which I trust you will have no difficulty in answering, that is, "Whom will you first help, your neighbor or yourself? " Surely I do not need to tell you that you have no more important duty at table as everywhere else, than to attend to the comfort of your companions. You must see that those about you are served, you must assist them so far as your position will permit, (never stretching out your arms or standing up to reach anything,) and you must continue your vigilance so long as you remain at table, passing dishes which are within your reach, asking politely if your neighbors want anything which you can give them, never helping yourself greedily or taking the last of anything unless you know that a second supply is to be had, and finally, never on any account rising from the table until every one else is ready, or you are excused for some reason of real importance. There are certain well-known rules in regard to the manner of eating, which you must obey absolutely if you intend to become well-bred men and women. The knife must be held in the right hand, and the fork in the left, when you are eating anything which requires to be cut ; but in eating fish, or other substances which do not need to be cut, the knife should be laid down, the fork taken in the right hand, and a piece of bread in the left, by the aid of which you can take up your food upon your fork, and convey it to your mouth. To eat with your knife is one of the cardinal sins at table ; it stamps you at once as ill-bred, or unpardonably careless. In taking soup, tea, coffee, or any fluid food, you must carefully avoid making any sound while drinking; swallow the liquid, whatever it