FoodNetArchive

The hearthstone; or, Life at home

1883

Page 209

Presented as published in 1883. Historical recipes may not meet modern food-safety standards. Cook from the modern interpretation, not the original instructions.
The tell- tale who carries the story from house to house, and touches it up with the paint-brush of her imagination as she goes along, is a wel- come guest wherever she goes. People may not like her for her- self, but they make much of her for the news she brings. It is no use reasoning with them, for they always have the excuse at hand that they are not free agents in the matter and cannot refuse to listen to her stories. The only cure for these itching ears is in being them- selves made victims of the gossip's tongue, instead of lofty and com- miserating critics ot other people and their affairs. They learn to shut their door against scandal only when it has assailed the happi- ness of their own fireside. Then they begin to see that talebearers and scandal-mongers are not good company for a peaceful, bright and contented home. 320 THE hearthstone; or, life at home. But these busybodies and talebearers, concerning whom every one who receives their visits ought to bear in mind that they will carry away fresh material for gossip from what they see and hear during their visit, are not the only unprofitable and untimely visitors who disturb the order and harmony of home. Good-natured and harm- less persons may sometimes be great bores to others without know- ing it. That which distinguishes one's own home from hotel and boarding-house life is its privacy, and freedom from the restraint which the presence of those who are not members of the family neces- sitates. Before guests, who are as familiar with our next-door neigh- bors as with ourselves, we have to be on our guard against an incautious word, which repeated elsewhere might do mischief, how- ever innocently meant. Many amiable but talkative persons never think of this. They repeat at one house what they have heard at another about the private affairs of individuals and families. How often do we wonder at the distant greeting and changed manner of a neighbor, and worry our minds in asking ourselves what possible offense we can have given ! Sometimes friends who were once intimate grow colder and colder to each other, until at last they pass each other in the street without recognition. One of the two parties may remain in ignorance all the time as to how the estrange- ment began. All that he or she knows is that their greeting did not meet with the same warm-hearted response as formerly; that the friend only bowed instead of stopping to shake hands as heretofore, and that by degrees the recognition became more and more distant until it ceased altogether. Little matters are often far more difficult to explain and set right than great ones. It is neither easy nor pleas- ant to ask for an explanation of another person's manner. One is never quite sure at first that the coldness may not have been acci- dental, or that we imagined another's manner changed to us when it really was not so. It makes a man or woman look foolish to ask for an explanation of an imaginary slight. The mere question places us at a disadvantage, and if the other party is conceited we run the risk of gratifying their self-respect at the expense of our own. If COMPANY IN THE HOME. 32 I