FoodNet

The housekeeper's companion

1883

Page 12

Presented as published in 1883. Historical recipes may not meet modern food-safety standards. Cook from the modern interpretation, not the original instructions.
There are certain unoccupied ladies so over-friendly as to take the entree of the whole house. These are generally ultra- neighborly neighbors, who run in at all hours of the day and. evening; ferret out the ladies of the family wherever they may be; watch their proceedings when engaged, like good house- wives, in inspecting the attics, the store rooms, the cellars, or the kitchen. Never for a moment do they seem to suppose that their hourly visits may perhaps be inconvenient or unsea- sonable; or too selfish to abate their frequency even when they suspect them to be so these inveterate sociablists make their in- cursions at all avenues. They are quite domesticated in your house. They see all, hear all, know all your concerns. Their talk to you is chiefly gossip, and, therefore, their talk about you is chiefly the same. They are au fait of everything con- cerning your table. They find out everybody that comes to your house; know all your plans forgoing to this place or that; are well acquainted with every article you wear; are present at the visits of all your friends, and hear all their conversation. Their own is usually "an infinite deal of nothing.'* To avoid the danger of being overwhelmed by the sociabil- ity of an idle neighbor, discourage the first indications of undue intimacy by making your own visits rather few and far be- tween. A young lady of good sense and of proper self-respect will never be too lavish of her society; and, if she has pleasant neighbors, will visit them always in moderation. To friends or very intimate acquaintance visits may be left to create their own etiquette, as, in fact, they are left, whatever rules may be laid down. Not to go too frequently to the same house; not to stay too long when you do go; to let no intimacy overstep the bounds of courtesy, are obvious hints. Half an hour amply suffices for a visit of ceremony. The lady may not remove any article of her attire, even if politely requested to do so by the mistress of the house. If, however, your visit is to a particular friend, the case is different; even then, it is best to wait till you are invited to do so. Etiquette. ^^ Favorite dogs are never welcome visitors in a drawing room. Many people have even a dislike to such animals; they require watching lest they should leap upon a chair or sofa, or place themselves on a lady's dress, and attentions of the kind are much out of place. Neither ought a mother, when paying a ceremonial visit, to be accompanied by young chil- dren. It is frequently difficult to amuse them, and, if not par- ticularly well trained at home, they naturally seize hold of books or those elegant ornaments with which it is fashionable to decorate the drawing-room. In some families evening calls are allowed. Should you chance to visit such a family, and find that they have a party, present yourself and converse for a few minutes with an unembarrassed air, after which you may retire, unless urged to remain. A slight invitation given for the sake of courtesy ought not to be accepted. Make no apol- ogy for your unintentional intrusion; but let it be known, in the course of a few days, that you were not aware that your friends had company.