^ Why, it is a real relief to see the boiling
hot suds and lye water dash around ana
deluge tables, walls, shelves, stove and
floor once more, after all these years
endurance of that vile, slimy, push-the-
dirt-in-the-corners-and-leaye-it-there way
of mopping the horrible painted, grained
and varnished kitchens of the present
idiotic fashion. What! let the spiders
build webs over the range and stay there
the year around because the painted walls
are too good to have hot suds thrown
upon them?
Now, I hope that housekeeper from the
Great Frying Pan Valley will stay away
while I scald something. This is my
water cure, and my old Mike and Slim
Jim and Reddy know it is a good one.
I want to scald the winter and spring
mouldiness, the bugs and roaches, _ flies,
muddaubers, dadHy-longlegs, spiders,
centipedes, mice,toads, snails and things,
and there will be no reserved seats for
spectators for a while. One afternoon,
not long since, I went to show an old
second of mine who is pastry cook at the
Bendebeer House at Bingen-on-the-
Bayou, how to make the Kaaterskill flan-
nel rolls, sometimes called German puffs,
that are just now the fashion, and while
there had a chance to try the efficacy ol
boiling water. That house, too, has a
painted and varnished kitchen with every-
thing as inconveniently placed as all th«
SAN FRANCISCO HOTEL GAZETTE'S
34
modern improvements could possibly be,
and altogether too nice for cleanliness.
There are patent doors with patent springs
to shut them up quick to keep the fresh
air out; patent windows with nickel-
plated fastenings and blinds and screens
and shutters to keep the foul air in. The
meat block is at the other end of the
table distant from the broiler; the pastry
room is two rooms distant from the oven ;
the kitchen floor is covered with oilcloth
and a girl slimes itoverwitha mop at
eleven every morning, and the cock-
roach population of that fine house is
over a hundred millions (estimated).
Seeing an odd million or so of the abomi-
nable insects roosting in a bunch under a
low shelf near the range I could not
resist the temptation to sling a two-quart
and go back to their old haunts.
It is all egregious folly making kitchens
too good to stand boiling water. At
some hotels that have been rebuilt two
or three times and thereby cured of the
first follies and made right at last. They
have stone floors in the kitchens even
when up stairs, and tile drains where the
water may flow free. The old and nat-
ural style of kitchen had massive oaken
beams and rafters, solid oaken tablets and
walls or wainscot that could be scrubbed.
Every time I chop the fins and head off
a fish, or strike a broiling chicken with
the side of the cleaver to flatten it for
the gridiron a spray of animal juices flies
and strikes somewhere. It may be scarce-
ly visible at one time yet it coats over
the walls alter a whlie. On the river we
dipper of hot boiling water. Brought call the dividing walls bulkheads and we
them all down at one shot. But, as if that i " " ' -----
was not enough, from some painted and i
grained little cuddy hole underneath a lot
of mice skipped out,for the hot water had
fallen into a breeding pla(ie that had been
undisturbed perhaps since the house was
built. It bemg none of my funeral I left
the place before the cook came home.
Swash, Zip!
Page 167
Presented as published in 1886. Historical recipes may not meet modern food-safety standards. Cook from the modern interpretation, not the original instructions.
AI-modernized reading of the original text
^ Why, it is a real relief to see the boiling hot suds and lye water dash around and deluge tables, walls, shelves, stove and floor once more, after all these years endurance of that vile, slimy, push-the-dirt-in-the-corners-and-leave-it-there way of mopping the horrible painted, grained and varnished kitchens of the present idiotic fashion. What! let the spiders build webs over the range and stay there the year around because the painted walls are too good to have hot suds thrown upon them?
Now, I hope that housekeeper from the Great Frying Pan Valley will stay away while I scald something. This is my water cure, and my old Mike and Slim Jim and Reddy know it is a good one. I want to scald the winter and spring mouldiness, the bugs and roaches, _ flies, mud-daubers, daddy-longlegs, spiders, centipedes, mice, toads, snails and things, and there will be no reserved seats for spectators for a while. One afternoon, not long since, I went to show an old second of mine who is pastry cook at the Bende Beer House at Bingen-on-the-Bayou, how to make the Kaaterskill flannel rolls, sometimes called German puffs, that are just now the fashion, and while there had a chance to try the efficacy of boiling water. That house, too, has a painted and varnished kitchen with everything as inconveniently placed as all the
modern improvements could possibly be, and altogether too nice for cleanliness. There are patent doors with patent springs to shut them up quick to keep the fresh air out; patent windows with nickelplated fastenings and blinds and screens and shutters to keep the foul air in. The meat block is at the other end of the table distant from the broiler; the pastry room is two rooms distant from the oven ; the kitchen floor is covered with oilcloth and a girl slimes it over with a mop at eleven every morning, and the cockroach population of that fine house is over a hundred millions (estimated). Seeing an odd million or so of the abominable insects roosting in a bunch under a low shelf near the range I could not resist the temptation to sling a two-quart
and go back to their old haunts.
It is all egregious folly making kitchens too good to stand boiling water. At some hotels that have been rebuilt two or three times and thereby cured of the first follies and made right at last. They have stone floors in the kitchens even when up stairs, and tile drains where the water may flow free. The old and natural style of kitchen had massive oaken beams and rafters, solid oaken tablets and walls or wainscot that could be scrubbed. Every time I chop the fins and head off a fish, or strike a broiling chicken with the side of the cleaver to flatten it for the gridiron a spray of animal juices flies and strikes somewhere. It may be scarcely visible at one time yet it coats over the walls alter a whlie. On the river we
dipper of hot boiling water. Brought call the dividing walls bulkheads and we them all down at one shot. But, as if that i " " ' -----
was not enough, from some painted and i grained little cuddy hole underneath a lot of mice skipped out,for the hot water had fallen into a breeding place that had been undisturbed perhaps since the house was built. It being none of my funeral I left the place before the cook came home. Swash, Zip!