“ a little near.” In expectation of a dinner-party,
which to him was a business dinner, expecting as he
did some friends from the City, he ordered a salmon
from his fishmonger, the price being £1. Fearing,
however, that his better half would find fault with
the price, and being anxiou-s to prove himself good at
a bargain, he paid down 10s., and sent home the fish
as if the remaining 10s. was the whole charge. On
his return, his wife, with great glee, told him how she
had disposed of the fish to her friend Mrs. ,
who had called, seen the fish, and, thinking it remark-
ably cheap, had offered 15 s. for it, which offer had
been gladly accepted. The wretched man’s feelings
can be better imagined than described ; but the
moral of the story, which is really true, seems to be —
Don’t deceive your wife !
43
IV. — COLD LEG OF MUTTON.
A few years ago the leading comic journal of the day
had the following graphic little sketch : — A middle-
aged gentleman, leaving his house-door in the morning,
inquires —
“ What is there for dinner to-day, Mary ? ”
“ Cold mutton, sir.”
“ Then you can tell your mistress that she need
not wait dinner for me.”
Now, although this sounds exceedingly selfish, yet
perhaps the blame is not entirely due to one side
only.
There can be no doubt that, just as among the
lower orders there are hundreds of wives who, from
ignorance and stupidity, drive their husbands to the
public-house, so among the middle classes there are
t
as many who from the same causes too often drive
them to the “ Club.”
Now, the increase in the number of these luxurious
establishments in the present day is something won-
derful. It has already had a marked effect upon the
restaurants in the metropolis, some of which now do
not dine half what they did formerly ; but it remains
44
Common-sense Cookery.
to be seen how far the clubs will in time affect the
Registrar-General’s marriage-returns. As this latter
point is of the greatest importance to that large and
charming portion of the population, the young un-
married ladies, we trust we may be pardoned if for
one moment we pause to ask them a few questions.
Did you ever consider how your future husband is
accustomed to dine every day, and contrast it with
the way in which he will dine when you will have the
management of the household? We will suppose
him to be accustomed to the ordinary club dinner, or
say the regimental mess. Do you not feel how en-
tirely dependent you will be on your cook ? Should
she be clever and honest, you may do very well.
Should she, however, be idle and dishonest, what
will you do ?
Now do not, pray, think that to get a good com-
mon-sense cook is by any means an easy affair. If
you only inquire of your friends and relations, you
will soon find out the difficulty.
You have all probably read that exquisite little
sketch in “David Copperfield,” who mildly addresses
his “child-wife” as follows : — “ You must remember, I
am sure, that I was obliged to go out yesterday when
dinner was half-over, and that the day before I was
made quite unwell by being obliged to eat underdone
veal in a hurry ; to-day I don’t dine at all ; and I am
Cold Leg of Mutton.
45
afraid to say how long we waited for breakfast, and
then the water didn’t boil. I don’t mean to reproach
you, my dear, but this is not comfortable.”
Page 15
Presented as published in 1880. Historical recipes may not meet modern food-safety standards. Cook from the modern interpretation, not the original instructions.
AI-modernized reading of the original text
“ a little near.” In expectation of a dinner-party, which to him was a business dinner, expecting as he did some friends from the City, he ordered a salmon from his fishmonger, the price being £1. Fearing, however, that his better half would find fault with the price, and being anxious to prove himself good at a bargain, he paid down 10s., and sent home the fish as if the remaining 10s. was the whole charge. On his return, his wife, with great glee, told him how she
had disposed of the fish to her friend Mrs. ,
who had called, seen the fish, and, thinking it remarkably cheap, had offered 15 s. for it, which offer had been gladly accepted. The wretched man’s feelings can be better imagined than described ; but the moral of the story, which is really true, seems to be — Don’t deceive your wife !
IV. — COLD LEG OF MUTTON.
A few years ago the leading comic journal of the day had the following graphic little sketch : — A middleaged gentleman, leaving his house-door in the morning, inquires —
“ What is there for dinner to-day, Mary ? ”
“ Cold mutton, sir.”
“ Then you can tell your mistress that she need not wait dinner for me.”
Now, although this sounds exceedingly selfish, yet perhaps the blame is not entirely due to one side only.
There can be no doubt that, just as among the lower orders there are hundreds of wives who, from ignorance and stupidity, drive their husbands to the public-house, so among the middle classes there are
t
as many who from the same causes too often drive them to the “ Club.”
Now, the increase in the number of these luxurious establishments in the present day is something wonderful. It has already had a marked effect upon the restaurants in the metropolis, some of which now do not dine half what they did formerly ; but it remains
Common-sense Cookery.
to be seen how far the clubs will in time affect the Registrar-General’s marriage-returns. As this latter point is of the greatest importance to that large and charming portion of the population, the young unmarried ladies, we trust we may be pardoned if for one moment we pause to ask them a few questions.
Did you ever consider how your future husband is accustomed to dine every day, and contrast it with the way in which he will dine when you will have the management of the household? We will suppose him to be accustomed to the ordinary club dinner, or say the regimental mess. Do you not feel how entirely dependent you will be on your cook ? Should she be clever and honest, you may do very well. Should she, however, be idle and dishonest, what will you do ?
Now do not, pray, think that to get a good common-sense cook is by any means an easy affair. If you only inquire of your friends and relations, you will soon find out the difficulty.
You have all probably read that exquisite little sketch in “David Copperfield,” who mildly addresses his “child-wife” as follows : — “ You must remember, I am sure, that I was obliged to go out yesterday when dinner was half-over, and that the day before I was made quite unwell by being obliged to eat underdone veal in a hurry ; to-day I don’t dine at all ; and I am
Cold Leg of Mutton.
afraid to say how long we waited for breakfast, and then the water didn’t boil. I don’t mean to reproach you, my dear, but this is not comfortable.”